A New Voice

My whole life so far has been a push to get to the next thing.  To achieve the next goal.  I've been pushing and working to be right where I am (maybe not Alaska specifically, but you get the idea) since I decided to become a dentist back in 2007.  But that was during college, a place I wouldn't have been without good grades and the solid work ethic I developed in High School.  Which was obviously a carryover from that high-energy Middle School kid I was before that.  Don't forget the little me who was always fascinated by science and helping others!

Ok, so I guess... theoretically... I've reached the place I've been pushing for my whole life.  But what does that mean?

To me, it means this.  It's time to decide what's next.  I have thoughts and ideas about what I want to do, who I want to be, etc., but there's no carrot sitting out there for me to chase anymore.  Not an obvious one, anyway.  In some ways I feel like I'm "done" with what I wanted to accomplish.  And in a purely goal-oriented sense, I guess I am.  I didn't plan any further than this.  I wanted to be a dentist.  Poof.  Done.

Now What?

I thrive on structure and planning.  It's in my blood (all my blood cells are in perfect lines and neatly flow through their respective vessels).  Until now, most of that structure has been structured for me.  And you'd think that in the Air Force it would still be there.  It is to an extent, but I'm undecided on if the Air Force is going to be my long term plan so even that structure may not apply to me.

From birth to the end of my AEGD residency, there were goals to hit and tasks to hit them.  Now the goal is... whatever I want it to be!  It's freeing and a little scary at the same time.  My life has always revolved around some sort of curriculum or syllabus and has been divided into 9-week and 2-semester intervals.  No more!  It's summer time and for the first time ever, I don't really have a "summer break".  I worked a lot when I was younger during high school and college (even dental school) and I'm so thankful I did.  It showed me life outside of the academic bubble, and I'm fully immersed in that now.

The last few months in Alaska has sort of been me kicking up my feet and not feeling the pressure of performance from outside sources for the first time in my life.  But as those voices from the outside fall away into the past, a new voice has emerged to push me.

Mine.

Ok, weird dude. What's that about?  So without professors and instructors and mentors saying "don't do that" or "let me show you"... even "nice job!" and "good work!", I have to be that for myself now.  It's made me thankful for the training I've received because I have an internal compass of what I want to do and what I want to be.  I have to look at a filling and say "wow that's great!" or look at an impression and say "I really need to take this again", no one is doing that for me.

And it's slowly coalescing into a new vision for my life, one that's still pretty blurry (but getting clearer) right now.  As a believer in Christ, I am constantly pulled towards things and ideas that allow me to give to others more than I take.

Just an introspective post for you guys.  Remember that all the training you're going through is helping you develop your voice.

Specific questions can be sent to my email.  Comments are moderated so they take a couple weeks sometimes for me to check up on.  Have a great summer!

The End of the Beginning

Well... that does it. It seems like just yesterday I was stressing out about the start of summer anatomy and here I am. My first year of dental school is done! It's hard to really comprehend the fact that's it's over because it just went by so unbelievably fast.

Here are some things I learned about the Air Force, dental school, and life in general, during my first year.

1. The Air Force are emailing professionals:

These people are so efficient at answering questions and replying to emails, it's staggering. I'm not exaggerating either. Only twice have I sent an email during business hours and not gotten a reply in 15 minutes. They're extremely helpful and professional and get stuff solved ASAP. Great people.

2. Dental school is way more than grades:

So many people in my class, including myself, have missed certain grades by a fraction of a point, but when it comes down to it, that's not what really matters. Sure, some may be wanting to specialize, but in the end, it's about learning as much as you can to be a competent dentist. This is especially true with science classes. Yes, these are tough and often worth quite a few credit hours, but they have little to no bearing on how you will perform as a dentist. Take it easy, and focus energy on doing well in the dental classes if you are taking them simultaneously.

3. If you have 55 people in your class, you'll have 55 personalities to deal with:

This is pretty obvious, but it's an interesting dynamic in dental school. Never since elementary school are you with the exact same people all day, every day, taking the same classes with the same teachers. Amazing friendships are born, and some strange dynamics take shape. Some like to isolate themselves, while others will make a scene just to make a scene. In the end, you have to learn to respect each person for who they are or else you won't be able to fully appreciate anyone. Everyone has their strengths and weaknesses and just because someone isn't like you, doesn't mean they're doing something wrong. In fact, the only person like you, is you.

4. Finals week is 50% studying and 50% what you did leading up to finals:

What I mean is this. If you have a strong cushion going into finals week, you will hate your life far less. If you are stressing about a final because you need a 90 to get a B, while your friend needs a 70 to get a B, that sucks. Work your butt off during the semester when tests are more spread out to give yourself the luxury of picking and choosing where to concentrate during finals instead of worrying about just passing every class. Even if you could care less about getting an A, B, or C, study for the highest grade you can going into finals. Then you can slack off. You don't want to be the person that needs an A on a Biochemistry final just to pass the class and not get it.

5. Find what works for you:

Don't feel pressured to study in a group if you study better on your own. Don't feel obligated to use someone else's study notes just because they made a study guide for everyone. Don't feel like you have to stay isolated if you want a group to study with; just ask someone! Long story short, do what works for you.

6. Work together:

Like I said earlier, some in your class may want to specialize and that's fine. The way I see it is this: those that want to specialize will figure out how to. The more you all work together, the better you class will collectively do. Those at the top will still rise to the top, but those at the bottom will be a little higher as well. Don't let your ego get in the way of helping others and enjoying your time.

7. Your brain is not a to-do list or a calendar:

So don't trust it to be either. Get a to-do list app (I recommend wunderlist) and a sync-able calendar if you have a smartphone (Google Cal). Put EVERYTHING on there so you won't have that lingering thought in your head wondering if you've missed something.

Well that's about it for me. One quick note is that I ran for and was elected class president a couple weeks ago! I'll start serving in that capacity beginning June 6 and will end my term at the end of next spring. At that point, I can either run again or step away.

As always, email me if you have any questions!

From birth to college

Here is a quick rundown of my journey to college...

From my birth in 1987 to the end of high school:

From when I was born to about 4 or 5 years old, we lived in a house in Summit Place in OKC, OK. We then moved to a new house... in the same neighborhood... and were there for many many years...

In elementary school, I was the smart kid who played soccer every single day at recess. I was always very small and fast, and that worked to my advantage quite nicely on the playground. I remember wanting to be an astronaut when I grew up but that didn't happen. I heard astronauts had to be good at math and I wanted no part of that.

My most vivid memory from elementary school was when my kindergarten teacher sat me down and had a talk with me after I got caught stealing 'tickets', the currency of choice in a kindergarten class.

I was also in a Farm Fresh commercial when I was in kindergarten... oh the good old days...

As for middle school, this is my super awkward stage. I was pretty shy and just sort of weird, but I guess it all worked out. I had a massive growth spurt in 7th grade but sadly that was about all the growing I've ever done. I grew quickly and it gave me some knee issues, but I managed. I quit soccer before 8th grade to pursue football. My new dream: play in the NFL.

My most vivid memory from middle school was during PE class in the morning of September 11, 2001. They called off PE for the day and let everyone watch the news for a couple hours. It was the most unbelievable thing I had ever seen and I'll never forget what it felt like to watch those towers fall.

In high school, things pretty well went according to the generic 'high school kid' template. I played football, had a few girlfriends, and spent far too much time watching TV and eating. High school football probably had the biggest impact on me because it showed me what working hard over a long period of time can bring you. It made me appreciate doing something for the long-term rather than just doing it for instant success.

My most vivid memory from high school was when I tore my ACL days before our first scrimmage sophomore year. I had to sit out the entire year and had to play with a knee brace for all of my Junior year. This pretty much cut out all hopes of the NFL thing, so I refocused again. This time, I decided I wanted to be an architect... but as I'll explain later in the college post, that didn't really pan out either...